Bonus Shenanigans

fem malevolent would just be

alice lester

jane doe

the queen in yellow

“why are you so angry alice?”

“i’m on my period”

“what the fuck is a period?”

“how do you not know what periods are, jane?”

“BECAUSE IM NOT A HUMAN, ALICE. i’m from the dark world. i’m an eldritch monster”

Okay but when Kayne freezes time to reveal John's deal with him Larson, the Butcher and Noel are just in the background watching.

Like, imagine you are the Butcher who has the bare minimum of context on all of this and suddenly you're frozen, and everyone else is frozen, and a guy just appears beside Arthur and starts monologuing.

Like here is what he just experiences frozen and unable to move:

KAYNE (loudly): So close! 

KAYNE (innocently): John?

KAYNE: And? And!? (Unimpressed.) And what.

KAYNE: Stopped everything? Why, yes.

KAYNE: How!? (He walks as he talks.) How am I supposed to explain that to you? God, you sound just like your little host family here, questioning everything! Some things just happen, Marigold.

KAYNE: Deal? What deal?

KAYNE: Oh, I don’t recall a contract or written word, really.

KAYNE (dangerously): You’ll what? 

 KAYNE: Oh! You know what? I do remember! (Recollecting.) Oh, oh, oh. We did make a deal, didn’t we? First, you were sent back into the King. Right? (Theatrically.) Whole once again! 

KAYNE: It was right after our little crumpet tried to shave his neck with the pointy end. Right? Then… hm. (He sucks air through his teeth.) Then what happened? You don’t remember, do you? 

KAYNE: Yes! You were… well, you were cast out, weren’t you? The King just – well, couldn’t make you fit anymore, could he? (Vigorously.) Too much soul in there! A broken mirror in too many pieces to put together again. (He pretends to cry.) 

KAYNE: Oh, of course! You were changed! A new… man? Entity? Thing? What are we calling you, exactly? (A short pause. Coyly.) Dandelions are yellow!

KAYNE: And so he cast you out! While in his realm, the King still had considerable power over you. Whatever you are. And sent you back to the one place you dared not ever return! (Cruelly.) Isn’t… that… right? 

KAYNE (dramatically): The Dark World! It was scary there, wasn’t it? 

 KAYNE: I mean, scary doesn’t even begin to sell it, but Arty promised he’d never send you back there, didn’t he?

KAYNE (faux aghast): And yet, your little deal had you end up right where he promised you’d never be!? Oh, how infuriating that must’ve been! (He laughs maniacally.) Oh. You would’ve done anything to get out again. Wouldn’t you? But first! You had to sink a little lower. Didn’t you? 

Time moves differently in the Dark World, doesn’t it? You didn’t just give up. You… You fell back on your old ways. The King who was trapped there before all of this… it was only when you were truly defeated that you called to me. (Abruptly.) Begged for me! The things you did for me to make this deal… (Shudderingly.) Ooh! 

KAYNE: But you got out. How did it feel, lying to Arthur this whole time? Not being able to tell him why you were coming here and … where you came from.

KAYNE: Not true! (Insolently.) Matthew had a choice! 

KAYNE: Absolutely! That little rapscallion let it slip, didn’t he? I told him to keep a tight, heavy lid… if Arthur knew that I wanted him here, he wouldn’t do it! But… could he keep that to himself? Hardly!

KAYNE (snidely): Well, because he made his choice.

KAYNE: His to make! And you made yours, my King. And you… (Pleased.) Mm! Fulfilled our deal. In a manner of speaking.

 KAYNE: And? And you were released from the Dark World! (Dramatically.) Contract fulfilled! (A conjuring effect, the rustle of paper, and pencil scratching.) See? 

KAYNE: So now… you and Arthur can leave! (Bad cockney accent.) England, was it? (Normally.) No more secrets between the two of you.

KAYNE: I mean… I said I stopped them from moving, Johnny, but his ears still work. 

KAYNE: Am I wrong, Archie? (He snaps his fingers.)

ARTHUR (in horror): You…

Butcher: ...

John Malevolent is so funny. He'll see a fucked up goat man with glowing eyes chasing them through the woods while howling like a dog and go "Hmmm. . .Guys, I think something is off here☝️"

i root for all of my mutuals even if we don’t talk ❗❗ i see u an hope ur doin well an hope ur achieving ur goals 👀👏💓

i cant believe harlan guthrie liked the idea of arthur lesters body parts all being separate blogs so much that he found a way to work it into canon!

😈 You are not bound by the Hays code.

😈 You are allowed to have evil characters who are not punished by the narrative by the end of the story.

😈 You are allowed to have evil characters who win.

😈 You are allowed to have evil characters who make evil look fun and cool.

😈 You are allowed to make your fun, cool evil character the protagonist.

😈 You are allowed to glorify, romanticize and eroticize evil characters and villainous acts.

😈 You are not obligated to teach your audience a moral lesson.

reblog this to remind the person you reblogged it from that theyre loved

is there an Arthur lesters oxygenated and deoxygenated blood

I feel like there should be

@icryink I recently came across the ‘cringetober 2024’ and wanted to do it bc it looks pretty fun :D

Here is day one, a redraw of my friends drawing

First time I’ve posted art in a while, huh?

this is a work in progress rn