Chaotichandle - SANTA.

“You create your own world by your inner attitude,”

— Margaret Atwood, from “The Year of the Flood,” published c. 2009

Utonulá / Drowned Woman, 1893 - pastel on cardboard. ― Jakub Schikaneder (Czech, 1855-1924)

Always Deflect, Never Reflect

Imagine being so deep in denial about your own blunders

That every misstep you take feels like an attack against you,

Rather than a consequence of your own actions.

Every time you do wrong, it’s never your fault;

It’s the fault of those who noticed, those who reacted,

Those who dared to hold you accountable, albeit in a subtle way.

It's the fault of the press for criticizing,

Not the official for his serial corruption

You turn every consequence into a conspiracy,

Every criticism into cruelty,

Never once admitting that the damage began with you.

But reactions are human instinct—

And accountability could be, too, if only you’d accept it.

Every action comes with a reaction—whether you like it or not.

- Yvonne

𝑰𝒕'𝒔 𝒊𝒏 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒆𝒚𝒆𝒔. 𝑰𝒕'𝒔 𝒂𝒍𝒘𝒂𝒚𝒔 𝒊𝒏 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒆𝒚𝒆𝒔.

This is the way the world ends This is the way the world ends This is the way the world ends This is the way the world ends This is the way the world ends This is the way the world ends This is the way the world ends Not with a bang but a whimper

Sometimes you need to sleep, sleep a lot. Not to escape, but to rest your soul from your feelings. Because everything, absolutely everything devours you. Completely.

—Brain

“I put my hand on my chest and closed my eyes. I have a dinosaur heart, cold, massive, indestructible, a thick meaty red. And I have a glass heart, tiny and pink, that can be shattered… There was a ping. To my surprise, it had developed a minute crack, nearly invisible. But it was there, and it hurt.”

— Louise Erdrich, The Sentence

تآويل

أعلمك تريد لماذا لما حدث و ما يحدث..اعلمك متيقن كون الآتي هو ما سبق ..قد بلغ يأسك مبلغه..

أرجو أن تدرك أنك لا تدرك عدم ادراكك الا بالمحيط ..و لن تعلم مساحة تلك الدائرة بمجرد معلومية محيطها

كهلٌ أنّي له أن يخطو الي نفسه .. داخلي المشوه لم يدعني أبصر خارجي الا بالتشويه .. أبتذل ما أشعر تجاهك علّيَ أُخِف ما أحمل .. لم أُرِد الا ان تنعدم عدمية قدرتي مع رغبتي بكل شئ ..أن أُساير سريان نمطهم ..

أعتذر لك عما لم اقترف كونه سبب ما يقع

أعتذر كون الحروف تنتهي عند بداية حاجتي لادراكك تآويلي

حلت آزفتي و لم ينشق قمري بعد ..هي نبضاتي الأخيرة دعها تسري بها ..دعني أحياها فتحيا ..قد ابصرت الحياة بنورها

و أعذر عجزي بأن أريك من عتمتي ما ينير لك ما أنا

ان المشكلة تكمن بعدم ظهور المشكلة ..فماذا تريدني أن اخبرك ؟ …