Bygonearchive - In A World Full Of Lies, I Am The Only Truth.

Self aware anaxa (or any of the amphoreus cast at this point), and how he'd likely have a very different experience becoming aware post 3.2 has been all I can think about recently. This is more of a warm-up/ drabble with the idea before I flesh it out more. Just trying to find a way I feel comfortable writing him at the moment.

Masterlist

He was dead, that much he could be sure of. His plan to fuse his soul with the titan Cerces to become the titan in the next cycle was successful; he had felt his body dissolve and had dropped the core flame into the vortex of Genesis. 

So, how was he here? 

No matter, as the demised scholar Anaxagoras, time is the only thing preventing him from knowing the truth. 

Ultimately, every time he made any progress in finding out what was happening some other odd trait about his current predicament made itself aware. It started small, music playing as he was going about amphoreus, the area around him pausing here and there, barely noticeable.

Then the events started to escalate, he discovered that he couldn't speak to anyone. In fact, whenever he went to try he had the intriguing yet infuriating feeling of being absent from reality for the conversation made itself apparent, the sensation of not being in full control of his body at times eventually growing to all of the time and then there was the fight against Aquila. 

That seemed to act as the catalyst for these strange phenomena, as everything intensified afterwards. Shortly after the conclusion of the fight… 

He was no longer on Amphoreus. 

He didn't have control of his body, fights were taking turns, chests were littered behind puzzles, it was like he was skipping around in time and visiting events and battles that should have long since passed. 

It was as if someone was playing a game.

It was as if someone was playing a game.

And suddenly that hypothesis made sense. Rooting itself in the professor's mind, all he needed now was proof. Proof that there was a player. Then he could work on a method to make himself real, to gain power over his new reality. This new truth. 

Naturally, he met or rather interacted with you, shortly after this revelation. It didn't immediately click that you were the player, the person for whom he was essentially a glorified puppet, but it did in time. 

He didn't intend to fall for you. 

Of course, he hadn’t yet, no matter how purely logical he tries to be. Well. Don’t romance and reason go hand in hand, he shouldn’t feel ashamed to embrace such feelings. 

Try as he might, he couldn’t catch your attention no matter what actions he took. Triggering voice lines where and when he shouldn’t be able to; wrenching control back for the briefest of moments; sneaking extra rewards into your inbox, no jades of course, he couldn’t be too obvious for his safety; and even sending more in game messages than he was scripted with, given half of them are obscured behind anonymous icons. All for nought as you simply dismissed it all as glitches or simply lag from whatever device you were using to run it. 

It drove him insane. Bit by bit, denial after denial of his existence, you weren't questioning any of it. But fine. That's fine. He'll just have to work harder. 

The actions he takes get more prominent, more daring. It's not a simple matter of clueing you into it anymore, he has to prove his existence to you now. It's not something the professor is entirely used to, usually proving his own theorems to himself, others are rarely worth his time. 

One day he decides to clear out the rest of the team you'd assigned him to, hoping that if you logged in to him and only him then something might finally register. It succeeds in a way, gaining him a panicked logout from you when you noticed how every character other than Anaxagoras was knocked out. 

Progress. 

Small, but there. Tangible, real. He'd make you fall for - see him, in time. 

It’s no longer something in short supply now that he'd already fulfilled his position in the plot.

anaxa doesn't seem like the type to call anyone by anything other than their name, but there's definitely a difference in the way he says your name compared to everyone else's. your name rolls off of his tongue fluidly, almost gracefully; he says your name like a prayer — with the utmost reverence. for a notorious blasphemer who shuns the gods, one would think that you were his god with how preciously he treats your very likeness.

if he were to use some sort of pet name... i think he'd settle on "my dear" or "dearest." it's nothing extravagant or exceptionally creative, but it's not lacking in affection.

"thank you, my dear," he'll murmur. anaxa speaks in hushed tones around you, as only you are worthy of seeing him in such a vulnerable state.

"enlighten me, my dear," he'll chuckle. he'll fold his arms over his chest during impromptu debates, his uncovered eye twinkling with mirth and curiosity as you explain your reasoning.

"good night, my dear," he'll whisper. in the dead of night when he thinks you're asleep in your shared bed, he'll slide in beside you and whisper an apology if you stir. "go back to sleep, dearest," he'll tell you if you begin to wake, his fingers brushing over the exposed skin of your waist beneath the sheets.

i started a thing where i add a little kaveh to this canvas every day

here’s week 1

Hmph.

I was talking about moze with a friend and then this spiralled from there - still not quite sure how I managed to write 800 words in less than a few hours but ykw, I'm very happy with how this turned out.

Masterlist

Another late night, that’s all that this was meant to be. Struggling yet again to fall asleep at a rational time, you’d decided to abandon the comfort of a warm bed to return to the medbay. The routine was familiar to the whole express by now, as you’d become accustomed to one of the other members, they’d never given away who it was, or even if it was multiple taking turns, setting down breakfast on your desk in there for when you awoke after unfailingly falling asleep either in the patient bed or desk chair. 

Tonight was shaping up a little differently, or a lot differently in all honesty, because there was a man, bleeding, sitting in front of one of the cabinets, attempting to bandage himself while at the same time trying to clean up some of the blood. You couldn’t recognise whoever it was, considering they were facing the other direction, coated in blood. Getting Himeko or Mr Yang would be the best course of action; however, when you turned to leave, he spun around faster. 

“Moze?” 

He stayed silent, granted it was hard to tell if that was due to his demeanour or the head injury he’s sporting. Thankfully, now that you knew it was someone familiar it was a lot easier to decide what to do rather than continuing to be frozen in panic. 

“You’ve got to stop dropping in unannounced like this.”

The crow-feathered weirdo is silent as you flick on the lights, then move over to his side. A pin drop could be heard between the two of you, but ignoring that to go through the motions is easy enough. Moze had been dropping in with injuries more frequently recently, but his wound is shallower than any prior. First, help him onto the bed; then take off his hood, giving yourself better access to the injury.

It’s not until you step away for a brief second that he speaks. His voice is quiet, something that you have to strain to hear over the tap while scrubbing at your hands. 

“I’ll deal with the mess I left.”

You sigh, and if you wash your hands slightly more aggressively than needed, nobody will have to know. 

“That isn’t any of the things that I’m even thinking about. Why did you even come here?”

Maybe that sounded ruder than intended. 

“I mean, why didn’t you go to Jiaoqiu or the alchemy commission?” 

The silence returns after that, leaving you to gather some basic medical equipment to deal with the wound that’s been continuing to bleed the entire time. He barely flinches when you apply antiseptic and bandage it. The injury itself is nothing, something that looks far worse than it really is, which makes his appearance here even stranger. 

“You could have treated this yourself.” 

Still not a word and it’s almost infuriating this time. At this point, messaging Jiaoqiu is becoming an appealing idea; something you don’t consider much before reaching for your phone. Thankfully, you have the healer’s number; sadly, Moze seems against you doing so.

“Don’t.”

“He deserves to know you’re injured.”

“I came here for a reason.”

“Oh, I’m aware that there’s a reason behind this.”

Of course, as far as you’re aware he came here to hide the fact that he was injured. It was all too easy to see that’s what he was doing, but that doesn’t explain anything else. You know that you won’t get an answer either, so instead of dwelling on it, you return to the original goal you had for coming here so late. 

His eyes are glued to how you’re moving around, keeping yourself busy. Cleaning in a similar manner to his own habit, not stopping even as exhaustion starts to tug at you. There’s a small scoff as you sway on your feet for a moment, looking like you’re about to pass out on the spot. 

“You should sleep.”

“If I were able to, we wouldn’t be here right now.”

“You’re more tired than before.”

You send him a small scowl at that, nothing with malice, just mild annoyance. But was that a hint of a blush when you turned to him?

“I suppose as a shadow guard, you know some techniques to help fall asleep fast?”

“Perhaps.”

There’s a hand on yours moments after that, tugging it gently away from the supplies you were mindlessly sorting and resorting over and over. You let him, wanting to question why he’s acting like this, but being painfully certain you won’t get an explanation. Just as he refuses to explain the reason why he keeps coming to you, keeps coming to the express with increasingly minor wounds. 

“Sharing a bed with a partner improves sleep.”

He’s not being overly affectionate. Opting instead to pull you down next to him on the bed, putting his arm over your side before you can even kick off your shoes. 

“Is that supposed to be a confession?” 

No response. 

You can live with that. Because for once, he’s staying to recover rather than disappearing into the shadows again. 

This is a routine you could get used to.  

. ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁ Masterlist . ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁

>> Selkie Kaveh . ݁₊ ⊹ Since when has helping a stranger at the bar lead to marriage? Kaveh x reader, no preestablished relationship, fluff

>> Moze x medic!reader . ݁₊ ⊹ You'd long since fallen into a routine at night, one he seemed set on disrupting. You're nothing if not adaptable however. Moze x reader, pre-established platonic relationship, fluff

>> Self-aware Anaxa . ݁₊ ⊹ It was just a game, nothing more nothing less Anaxa x reader (one sided), drabble

plush

aventurine does not need you.

you are not rich, nor strong, nor smart, nor have a high position in places that could push him farther than he already is. he knows what “need” is—— wealth, status, power. so he knows he doesn’t need you.

however, he wants you.

that’s why he shows himself off like a peacock and buys you gifts very often and invites you on trips and keeps bringing up “of course i would do this or buy this or abcd for you, we are lovers after all”. he has all that you could possibly need, so he knows you should find him necessary, but it is not enough. he doesn’t think he will ever quite be satisfied. this greed that consumes him burns him inside out, he wants you to want him.

(he wants you to want that boy who has long since been left for dead in the shadow of aventurine, forgotten like the avgins. but that’s ridiculous, isn’t it? what’s there to want about a dirty boy in chains and nothing to his name?)

aventurine wants you.

and he will do his best to make you want him too.