I Cant...me Too Grian (x)

Right, right, I had an idea for an empires headcanon before I got....distracted

Anyway, I can’t remember what fic I originally saw it in, but I remember reading about the Grimlands and Crystal Cliffs being territories under Mythland. I also remember a post (by theminecraftbee I believe?) which talked about Smallholding having come from Mythland as well.

That got me thinking, so here’s my ideas about how the civilizations of Empires started.

Lizzie’s book mentions that she and Jimmy ruled over the ocean together long before the kingdoms of the land were formed. Well, we all know those evolutionary diagrams that show fish-like creatures crawling out of the water and becoming humans, right? And we’ve seen that leaving the water caused Lizzie to take on a form akin to what we consider normal humans. So my theory is that the current human civilizations came from the ocean.

Fish people from the ocean’s domain slowly explored the land, expanding outward into the original kingdoms: Mythland, Pixandria, the Lost Empire, and what would later become Mezalea.

(Note that this does not include the Overgrown or Rivendell because those places were already populated by various fae courts detached from these rising empires, hence why I specified human civilizations.)

Those who traveled West into the desert would form Pixandria. Though life was difficult, the use of rivers and other water gathering techniques allowed its formerly aquatic denizens to adapt. It would remain largely uninvolved with the greater continent, though, due to its initially harsh climate making those who had settled in more lush areas see nothing to gain from exploring it.

Those who traveled South into the swamp would continue onward and claim the long stretch of fertile land they called Mythland.

Those who attempted to make their way East would often find themselves lost in the unfamiliar, dense forests. It was long believed that any who traveled into these forests would die there, but unbeknownst to the outside kingdoms, those who survived would band together and established the Lost Empire.

At some point along the way, the ocean queen would create her submerged kingdom and make her presence known to the land dwellers. Much like herself, they had long since forgotten their watery past, so neither party recognized the other.

The people of Mythland were the first to establish contact with the fae. In exchange for items from the seas, which many of the fae had never seen before, they shared their own magic with the humans. They also showed them how to traverse around the forrest, leading to the settlements across from the main kingdom of Mythland. This would lead to the reconnection with those who had been thought lost within the great forrest as well, most of whom had long since adapted and were happy to remain where they were.

It was around this time that Jimmy followed in his sisters footsteps, arriving on the swamp. Those of Mythland took offense to these outsiders trying to claim their land, culminating in a war that would leave bad blood between the two kingdoms for centuries. Backed by the Ocean Empire, the amphibious cod people won, though, and erected the Cod Empire.

Meanwhile, this war had greatly disrupted Mythland. To make up for their losses, they began demanding more of the settlements to the East. These settlements, who had no active part in the war, believed that they should not have to shoulder such a burden, leading to harsh infighting. Unable to stand another war so soon, this dispute was solved politically, and the settlements were ultimately granted independence from the greater Mythland kingdom. They would later be peacefully divided into those who had integrated with the bordering fae courts, and those who remained true to their original way of ruling, becoming the kingdom of the Grimlands and its sister city-state, the Crystal Cliffs.

Much further down the line, long after many of the kingdoms were well established, infighting would strike Mythland yet again, this time from farmers who felt they were being tossed aside in favor of the kingdom’s growing industrialization. This feud was mostly bloodless and the Smallholding was able to emerge as an independent nation.

Meanwhile, a young gnome from a far away land would find herself lost within the depths of the forrest. Eventually giving up on her trek, she made her own small settlement, dubbed the Undergrove.

Of course, you’ll notice this leaves out Mezalea. In truth, it is unknown whether Mezalea was first inhabited by the humans or the fae. The people who came from the water found it utterly inhospitable, and the fae held no record of a court existing so far away. Those within it do have their own creation mythos, though.

It is said that a wandering traveler came across the long stretching mesa and fell in love with its beautiful colors. They spent their days crafting all kinds of clay items, from bowls, to vases, to statues. Many thought they were a fool, how could they stand to live in such a lonely, awful place? But they persisted, intent to make a masterpiece that would put those critics to shame. In their final years, it is said they became a recluse, only getting out of bed to work on this grand final project.

Years later, travelers would find no evidence of any breathing person in the mesa. Instead, they would find a tree, beautiful and splendid, as if crafted by the gods themselves, and tending to that tree, a host of clay statues that called it “Mother.”

me when i spend a long time drawing something that really does not look good at all and is honestly too ugly to want to share with anybody but i still recognize that it was worth the time and effort because i still gained practice and experience from it that will contribute toward improving my skills

[ID: a doodle of a person slumped over a drawing of a flower, giving a thumbs up with big wet eyes and a pained expression.]

He's so screenshotable

Imagine getting laughed at live on stream 

Sausage: ¡Hola, buenos días!

Jimmy: ¡Hola, Señor Chorizo!

Sausage: (dismayed) Ay, coño, que mi– Ay, Dios mío.

Jimmy: (speaking English) Guys, Sausage is Cuban, by the way. Everything’s fine.

Sausage: (overlapping) Yeah, I’m Cuban!

Jimmy: (continued) Everything’s good, everything’s fine… 

Sausage: (yelling) Yeah, this is not cultural appropriation! Did you know somebody said I was culturally appro-pria-zing–

Jimmy: (laughing) I… Someone…

Sausage: (continued) My own– my own race! And background– ethnicity! Did you hear that?

Jimmy: Someone– Was it a tweet…?

Sausage: Somebody literally said: stop–

Jimmy: Was it a tweet or a comment?

Sausage: It was a comment on one of my videos because–!

Jimmy: Someone commented to Sausage, chat, saying… 

Sausage: (giggles)

Jimmy: Saying Sausage’s whole thing was cultural… what was the word?

Sausage: Cultural appropriation! (fumbles) O-of my own people! They were like… “Stop speaking Spanish and putting Latin music in your videos! You’re appro-pria-zing… some other culture!” I was like what’s wrong with you, people?

Jimmy: It– The– the guy’s Cuban!

Sausage: That made me mad but…

Jimmy: He can– he–

Sausage: I’m Cuban! ¡Yo soy latino! I didn’t just learn Spanish yesterday like Jimmy did!

Jimmy: It– True! I just word– learned the word “chorizo”!

Sausage: ¡Chorizo!

Jimmy: I didn’t know it! Didn’t know it!

Sausage: (angrily) Muchas gracias.

when you're watching a jimmy video and someone does something nice for him unexpectedly and his entire face lits up and his voice raises a couple of octaves? that's half the reason I'm able to make it through a day

manifesting team rancher plot armor not dead not dead manifesting that they stay alive

ayo i found 2 pages with head angles of humans and animals, could be useful to anyone reading this

hoomans

animals

BUY AT BOATEM TOWN! DON’T MIND THE LAG!

Scar when it comes to being disgustingly loyal to blonde brown eyed white British men who are bird coded and associated with a primary color. I guess

bro has a type