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For the Love of Safe Sex (pt. 13)

HIStory 4: Close to You.

Because of the large number of displacements, I wrote my daughter’s name on his hand so that I do not lose my little girl, Jourie. Please help me so that I can save my daughter’s life. We will travel from Gaza and go to a safe place.😭😭😭🙏🙏🙏💔👇👇🔗

@90-ghost ,@nabulsi @northgazaupdates2 @el-shab-hussin

@riding-with-the-wild-hunt

@sar-soor

full offense but none of you would have ever survived fanfiction.net in 2009

Vegas and the Hedgehog dilemma

*Spoilers for episode 10*

Since episode 10 has been out, I’ve read a lot about Stockholm syndrome and Lima syndrome, normally used to justify relationships forged between abductors and their captives. While emotional psychology is not my forte (my area of expertise being language), what really caught my attention was the little hedgehog that I’m assuming Vegas has as a pet. Of all the attention given to details in his study room, the Virgin Mary with a skull, the gag ball, the lamp with green shade, the caged animal lit a bulb on my head.

Has anyone heard about the Hedgehog dilemma?

In short, hedgehogs are nocturnal animals with spines around their bodies. Unlike porcupines, their spines are way smaller and less noticeable but hard and painful in the same way. If not more. Similar to a cactus, you are aware of the large spines but sometimes the smaller ones go undetected, and then it is when you get prickled.

The hedgehog dilemma is really about intimacy. Like any other animal, hedgehogs long for physical warmth during winter and the way to obtain it is to get close to other hedgehogs. However, because they are not able to retract or shed their spines (and risk being eaten by predators), they end up stinging and hurting each other. In order to avoid pain, they need to keep a physical distance. Now let’s transpose this metaphor to human intimacy. People long for intimacy and warmth from other human beings. It is part of our psyche and crucial for our emotional stability. And intimacy can be at many levels – physical, emotional, sexual. However, because of one’s emotional baggage (or any other baggage – external, social, you name it), humans cannot get close to each other without hurting each other as well.

Now let’s transpose this dilemma onto Vegas.

Vegas.

Vegas Theerapanyakul.

Vegas, as I assume and from the hints we receive in the drama so far, has grown up in a very unhealthy environment. His father is everything but benevolent. His father does not accept his relationships, much less his sexuality. His father, and all the surrounding circumstances has made him use manipulation for survival. Vegas is, on a superficial level, cold, scheming, a psychopath I dare to say. He uses people to achieve his ends, he relishes in torture, and once they lose their purpose, he shoots them. There is no guilt or hesitation when he pulls the trigger (compare to how many times Kinn has pulled the trigger so far in the series).

Vegas is seemingly the perfect villain, but has anyone stop to think that he is hurt, so hurt beyond repair at this point of the series? Vegas is a hedgehog – he has deadly spines around him that he leaves a trail of devastation whichever he goes. But more than anything, Vegas longs for the warmth that he wants but never got. The scene with Tawan in front of the mirror, even when naked (which is one of the major steps one can take in terms of intimacy – to be naked with someone else and not be judged) feels rather fake and the complete opposite of intimacy. There are huge walls around Vegas there. It is almost as if Vegas had detached from his true-self and only a hollow version of him is left there to entertain Tawan and his delusion.     

So Vegas the hedgehog must have tried to become close to someone but the same way he has hurt others, others have hurt him. And rejected him – his father, the main family, Kinn (who I think he looks up to more than despise).

But we have another hedgehog in the series – Pete.

Pete’s spines are also out there – his smiley persona, his outgoing and carefree self. Pete strikes me as someone who is nice to everyone, but not really close to anyone. While Vegas has seen countless people succumb to his torture, Pete is the one to remain standing and refusing to entertain him.

No, no, no. Let’s rephrase that. Pete is the one to be able to see beyond the spines and accept Vegas.

No, no, no. Let’s rephrase it again.

Pete is the one to be able to bear the pain of Vegas’ spines and despite so, he is willing to remain by Vegas side. And Vegas, Vegas is not prepared to receive the full blow of Pete’s spines when these are out there pointing at him and stabbing him, inch by inch, skin and bones.

Because when it does, Vegas will understand what true intimacy is. And when he does, he will become so addicted to it that he will not know how to react.

And that, is what I am really waiting for.

(going back to my Kinn and Vegas protection corner)         

Assad Zaman at the AMC upfront event

Unfriendly fucking reminder that Anti fujoshi views are inherently anti queer, anti women and racist.

"But I am only refering to cishet girls" The ones recieving the impact on fandom are queer people, not cishet people. Queer people are the ones who see you ranting about anything they do in fandom is fetishizing, not cishet people. Also why do you openly admit to targeting girls and women and find no issue with that?

"But fujoshi means..." A misogynistic insult that women and other queer people have reclaimed from misogynistic dudebros frustranted that women had hobbies outside of making them their sandwich. To use fujoshi as an insult again is almost the equivalent of using queer as an insult again. You just look as a dick.

"But fetishizers..." 9/10 times whenever someone uses "fetishizers" they mean inocuous shit like sharing some fanart or saying a character is attractive. If someone is legit being gross about a group while still thirsting for them as a whole then yeah, that is bad, but you don't need to target them because of their sexuality or gender for that. Call out their actions when they are being demonsteably harmful, not when you don't like their ship.

"But I have queer asian trans men friends and they hate fujoshi too!" I literally didn't asked and that is irrelevant. Call out bad people when they do bad actions. If all they do is swoon over anime boys kissing and holding hands or full on fucking hardcore, that is not for you or your friends to police. This is not hard. Also, why only your queer asian friends you agreed with already are worth listening and the bunch of queer asian people telling you to stop this shit are not?

"But they..." No. Call out actual bad actions.

If the ultimate goal of your shitty movement is less people are able to share/enjoy/create queer content, think really hard about who that actually benefits because, trust me, it's not queer people.

"Even though I acted normal in front of everyone, but I was so lonely when you were away."

TAKARA NO VIDRO (2024). SPINOFF EPISODE.

Pete: I want to be the mole.

Kinn: Vegas will torture you if he finds you.

Pete: I fucking hope so

Kinn: What?

Pete: What-

johnny // nct 127 - dj (230212 sbs inkigayo ending fairy)

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