Maybe There Is No Best Version Of Myself. Just Me, Right Now, Vulnerable And Tired And Hopeful, Willing

*covered in blood* i will.... *trembling* CHOOSE TO BE KIND... *in pain* i will be... NICE to others... *wanting to kill* i will see good in EVERYONE *yelding a knife* i will NOT be like those who hurt me... *screaming* i will be BETTER than who i was...

Alice Notley, In the Pines

𝐈 𝐡𝐚𝐭𝐞 𝐰𝐡𝐞𝐧 𝐩𝐞𝐨𝐩𝐥𝐞 𝐚𝐬𝐤 𝐦𝐞 𝐡𝐨𝐰 𝐈 𝐟𝐞𝐞𝐥 𝐛𝐞𝐜𝐚𝐮𝐬𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐧 𝐦𝐲 𝐦𝐢𝐧𝐝 𝐠𝐨𝐞𝐬 𝐭𝐡𝐫𝐨𝐮𝐠𝐡 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐞𝐧𝐝𝐥𝐞𝐬𝐬 𝐯𝐨𝐢𝐝 𝐨𝐟 𝐞𝐦𝐨𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐈'𝐦 𝐞𝐢𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫 𝐟𝐞𝐞𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐲𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐚𝐭 𝐨𝐧𝐜𝐞 𝐨𝐫 𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐚𝐭 𝐚𝐥𝐥 𝐬𝐨 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐧 𝐈 𝐣𝐮𝐬𝐭 𝐞𝐧𝐝 𝐮𝐩 𝐬𝐡𝐫𝐮𝐠𝐠𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐬𝐚𝐲𝐢𝐧𝐠

“𝐈 𝐝𝐨𝐧'𝐭 𝐤𝐧𝐨𝐰“

~happy father’s day i guess

Please go easy on me. I’m having a bad decade.