When I Was A Teenager It Felt Very Revolutionary To Be Cruel To Myself. Like Some Kind Of Slow Passive

when i was a teenager it felt very revolutionary to be cruel to myself. like some kind of slow passive protest against how much everything hurt. i starved myself of sleep and food and tenderness because it felt right. it felt sharp and angry and radical and i wanted to be those things. adulthood is the realisation that the world is already working to cut into you well before you learn how to do it yourself. caring for yourself and others is the real protest

More Posts from Arcticbluebird and Others

2 years ago

One thing I’ve realized during the pandemic is that NTs are actually pretty rigid. Despite the fact that a certain rigidity of thinking and need for routine are often mentioned as hallmarks of neurodivergence (most often for people on the spectrum, but it does come up occasionally for other things like ADHD, anxiety, etc), the antimask crowd is overwhelmingly NT.

Among ND people I know, the response to masks has varied. Some really like them, because they don’t need to spend a ton of energy thinking about their facial expressions. Some have basically gone “I don’t like them, but whatever. It is what it is.” And a small few have had sensory issues they can’t figure out a work around for, so they just do curbside pickup and avoid situations where a mask is needed as much as possible.

And when you think about it, it’s not very surprising. ND people, whatever our individual issues, are pretty used to having to move through a world not designed for us. Why would a pandemic be any different?

Meanwhile, we got to witness NTs having meltdowns because they couldn’t get a haircut. The pandemic had interrupted their routine, and they couldn’t handle it. For the first time, they were living in a world that wasn’t designed around their desires.

So apparently rigidity and a need for routine aren’t a ND thing, so much as what happens when human beings live in a society that isn’t designed around their preferences.


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2 years ago
Some Better Pictures Of The Leafkerchief. It’s Made Of A Plain Green Cotton, With Facings In A Much
Some Better Pictures Of The Leafkerchief. It’s Made Of A Plain Green Cotton, With Facings In A Much
Some Better Pictures Of The Leafkerchief. It’s Made Of A Plain Green Cotton, With Facings In A Much
Some Better Pictures Of The Leafkerchief. It’s Made Of A Plain Green Cotton, With Facings In A Much

Some better pictures of the leafkerchief. It’s made of a plain green cotton, with facings in a much lighter weight cotton, and after I sewed and turned all the points right side out I topstitched as close to the edge as I could. The inner edge of the facing is hand sewn with a slipstitch, and the veins are painted on.

I got a lot of questions about this, so I will do a blog post about it, and will include a pattern diagram!


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1 year ago

lahore pigeons are some of the most visually appealing birds out there. like in terms of visual design. very minimalist, good contrast.


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2 years ago

Do you ever just make something?


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2 years ago
Most Ironic Photos
Most Ironic Photos
Most Ironic Photos
Most Ironic Photos
Most Ironic Photos
Most Ironic Photos
Most Ironic Photos
Most Ironic Photos
Most Ironic Photos
Most Ironic Photos
Most Ironic Photos
Most Ironic Photos

Most ironic photos

1 year ago

one of the biggest things I can advocate for (in academia, but also just in life) is to build credibility with yourself. It’s easy to fall into the habit of thinking of yourself as someone who does things last minute or who struggles to start tasks. people will tell you that you just need to build different habits, but I know for me at least the idea of ‘habit’ is sort of abstract and dehumanizing. Credibility is more like ‘I’ve done this before, so I know I can do it, and more importantly I trust myself to do it’. you set an assignment goal for the day and you meet it, and then you feel stronger setting one the next day. You establish a relationship with yourself that’s built on confidence and trust. That in turn starts to erode the barrier of insecurity and perfectionism and makes it easier to start and finish tasks. reframing the narrative as a process of building credibility makes it easier to celebrate each step and recognize how strong your relationship with yourself can become

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arcticbluebird - he take a big steppy
he take a big steppy

Finch || they/them or ae/aer || amateur artist and hot mess

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