i smell the rain and all of a sudden i’m back with you in the city. the city where even with sirens, thousands of people, and too little square footage, we made a life.
i’d never been in a room so tense. then everyone came back broken.
you told me i was cruel. all i said was that you were the loss of my life. why would i lie to you? i don’t think i am capable of it.
i will close your door but i refuse to lock it.
if the hunger games were real, i would’ve eaten those berries without you. i would’ve let you win.
i wrote all day trying to string together a sentence but i simply cannot. there are no words, feelings or colors to describe the pain you cause me.
you watch as the tall, mighty flame that i once was drowns in your cruel, unforgiving flood. and you enjoy watching all my glory turn to nothing but blackened scars.
in march, time goes at a steady pace, but tomorrow it will be october and i will have not spoken to you since february and i will forget that i have ever spoken to you.
i can feel myself falling. and i have never ever been happier.
i scream. i scream so loud. i scream so that my ears are ringing and my jaw hurts. i scream so that tears well up in my sad eyes. i scream my life away. for no one to hear a thing.
i’ve always been told
that 3am is some haunted hour
where your subconscious thoughts
claw their way into reality
but 4am is the true evil
it’s the unbearable silence
when the monsters in my head
stand at the edges of my vision
to watch me toss and turn