PSA: Never Discuss Private Affairs In Your DMs, Especially Contraception And Abortion. Social Media Moguls

isn't it so funny there's such a thing as "customer service voice"? Like I have to speak to you like a child or you'll rip my face off like a wild chimp

its all 'be gay do crime' until a black person starts making allusions to drugs or sex or god forbid VIOLENCE and then it turns out nobody can handle anything more hardcore than downloading illegal torrents of hamilton

Do you accept

Begging everyone on the internet to stop smoothing out their middle aged men and draw wrinkles for the love of god I promise it's so fun you'll love it Come into my wine cellar

easily one of my favourite tweets of all time

fungal Bruno Mars I'd help food waste degrade for u

evil bruno mars i’d throw a grenade at you

Theyre called draculas because they drank u. La

Breaking Bad ☆ The Evolution of Jesse Pinkman

you guys Need to start seeing bugs as animals im not even joking anymore. the second u start seeing them as tiny animals the more your world opens up and the more you accept different types of life Into that world. youll begin accepting that even life you cant understand is still worth living. and itll legitimately make you a better person. fuck

just found out that if i stay in my room all the time my life will eventually shrink to the size of it and i will lose all memory of how to function as a person. shocked & upset