Somewhere In Here There’s A Joke About Mobius Riding Loki

that’s a whole softball pitch wtf

stop whatever you’re doing AND LOOK AT MY MAN CAPTAIN STEVE ROGERS AMERICA

I AM DECEASED

squishy

you ever look at an iv blood bag thing and just wanna … squish squish

gorgeous gorgeous boys kiss their trophies

them

roger haircuts as weirdly specific and random ppl (this is a joke ok pls guys)

mtv musician who’s been trying to start an acting career but ends up partying at frat houses every weekend even though he’s not in a frat so how the hell does he know these people. was drunk during an interview on national television

coworker at your office job that you’re trying very hard not to fall in love with because you’re just friends, which becomes increasingly difficult since he leaves cute messages on sticky notes on your cubicle wall and he’s the only thing that makes your day tolerable

famous spanish singer that you only know about because your mom tears up every time people talk about him. he passed away years before you were born but you occasionally hear him playing on the tv and his music’s actually really good

that one guy that everyone on your college campus knows only because he’s always carrying around a guitar case for some reason even though you’ve never even seen him play. you ran into him twice at a karaoke bar and he’s nice enough but makes weird conversation. your friends refers to him as “you know, the guy that looks like jesus”

your friend’s friend that seems decent but also scares you because sometimes you all hang out at the bowling alley and once he snapped at the clerk and you can’t really tell if he hates you or not

bratty actor who is notoriously known for his attitude, once walked off a set because he thought “this line is stupid and the scriptwriters are a joke, i can’t play such a humiliating role” but you have to tolerate him anyway because he has genuine talent and you signed a contract as his agent

“Criminal justice major at WT 👨🏻‍💻

✈️ love to travel :) 🎣🏌🏼‍♂️

wanna get to know someone for real

class of 2017 go buffs 🇺🇸”

is his bio. on everything.

op i know damn well you didn’t just create one of the coolest soulmate aus ever

I just created a paracosm where my paras stop aging when they find their soul mate lol lately i'm too emotional and corny